(If relationships had democracy…)

If there was freedom of speech. Freedom of movement. Freedom of expression. Freedom of mass communication. Then I guess we wouldn’t be lying to one another. I imagine,that my girlfriend will ask me if it’s okay to date another dude. She’ll notice him. She’ll tell me that he is her crush. And I, I would be in charge of vetting the dude in some sort of an evaluation process. To see if he is worth my girlfriend. If he is worth the tender. Knowing that it would just be a fling, that it would fade away eventually. That the dude will run off after delivering his services, I’ll allow my girlfriend to go to him. ‘Cause, she asked me if it’s okay to have him. And I agreed. For I’ll be here to stay in her life. And I’ll ask of the same, and she would arguably agree to it, when I want to be with another girl. ‘Cause this are what we often go through in relationships. But behind the curtains, when our patners are not aware. So how about we do it in an open space, to save our patners the heartache and sheer jealousy?

It wouldn’t be called cheating. We wouldn’t be lying to ourselves. When he’s done with the other chick, you’ll ask your boyfriend, “did that bitch treat you right?”. This is not just a game. when your girlfriend will have finished with that other dude, you’ll ask her, “did that Nigga treat you right? , did you guys use a condom? ?”. See, you’ll have set the rules of the game. Transparency and accountability will be of high value. “Did that Nigga satisfy you?”. If she says no, then you’ll have to look for that Nigga, and hold him accountable for under performance. I don’t know, but if you may, you can beat the crap out of him, for having an excellent CV with nothing tangible in person. If she says yes, then you might discuss the available options, terminating her contract with the dude, or let the dude continue providing his services. As you will be doing the same.

If relationships had democracy, then I guess we’ll all be like public enterprises. Easily accessible to anyone within the public domain. A thing with all these public enterprises, is that with time they lose value, they start under performing, ’cause their resources will have been outstretched. They’ll fall eventually, and no one will dare look at them with lascivious eyes as they used to, when they were still privatised. See, there’s a beautiful thing with privatisation of relationships, it makes us remain in the realm of being reserved for the person we love. It makes us look expensive in the eyes of the public, that they wouldn’t afford to have us. We only start losing that, when we act cheap, when our value depreciates and act in desperation. A thing with the desperate ones, is that they tend to be clingy. They don’t know their worth. So come on girl, hide your pussy to the world. Come on dude, stop flaunting your cock to the masses.

If relationships had democracy. I imagine, that we would limit ourselves to some sort of a social contract. That we would occasionally renew when our term has expired. Like politicians, knowing all the promises they never kept. Yet we do re elect them. Would you renew your contract with your boyfriend, knowing all the things he said to hurt you. Will you still love him? If relationships had some sort of such democracy, to build on transparency and accountability of our hidden affairs, to achieve trust. I imagine, that my girlfriend and I, will have formed some sort of a coalition government. Where we’ll all bring all the issues on the table. And help each other achieve their desires, even if It means hurting our own self. Are we ready to be that selfless, with the one we love??

I guess not. I guess all relationships are dictatorial in some way. You don’t do this because your girlfriend doesn’t like it. You stop chatting with your male friends because your boyfriend doesn’t like it. He can’t handle a little form of competition. He has insecurities paraded on his eyes the moment you step out. You can’t even fart in bed, because your girlfriend is sleeping next to you. There’s no freedom of snoring. No freedom of drinking with buddies at the pub during weekends. He can’t trust you, because you have more male friends than female friends. He can’t understand any better. You’ll have to go through his phone, and demand knowing who are his contacts. If they ain’t his siz or mom, what business do they have in his phone?

I don’t know any better. Somehow we always get it wrong. We have forgotten that relationships are like marriage. If you are not ready for commitments, why waste time? If you are not ready for some sort of dictatorship why even bother?. Go out there and find your own democracy.

Trust me, I’m in my own democtatorship, and I love it.